From Burnout to Breakthrough: How I Learned to Put Myself First

A documentary director's raw journey from 17-hour workdays to genuine wellbeing

How does a dream come true turn into a nightmare? How does travelling the world for a year, to 30 countries and 70 cities with the love of your life, turn into one of the most life-threatening experiences?

Rock Bottom Wasn't Pretty

I was 22 years old, fresh out of film school, and I had managed to get funding for a documentary series, which involved travelling the world to interview a new stranger every day. 365 documentaries in 365 days. Ambitious, yes, but I wasn’t aware yet that my need to prove myself, combined with my unhealthy relationship with work, and my perfectionism would push me far beyond my limits.

Together with my then-partner (now husband), we set off on our worldwide adventure. We worked 17-hour days for a year. If we were awake, we were working. Filming, editing, marketing, social media, trying to secure more funding and sponsorships, while also just figuring out where we would sleep that night. We lived off pure adrenaline for an entire year, army crawling to the 365th-day deadline. Panic attacks became a daily ritual, going to sleep jittering from the residual adrenaline coursing through our bodies, flying off the handle with each other to discharge our internal tension—this all became our normal.

Rock bottom wasn’t pretty. Is it ever? Once we returned home and the deadline dissolved, the effects of the adrenaline made themselves known. Our bodies aren’t designed to live in a chronic stress response, so in-doing so of course there are going to be consequences. My body was about to pay the tax for my chronic stress. A number of autoimmune diseases took hold of my body, I experienced extreme fatigue, chronic pain, a trashed immune system, and crippling anxiety and overwhelm 24/7. I had officially burnt out.

What Burnout Really Looks Like

High achievers or people who tend to over-function as a response to stress can be particularly vulnerable to burnout. In my case, my internal sensor for when I was going past my limits felt faulty. I’d go and go until my body literally humbled me with illness to stop. If you’re wondering if you’re burnt out or just stressed, here’s your biggest clue: do you have less or more energy after a full day of rest? If you have less it's likely you're burnt out and are overdue for a complete reset.

Burnout can be a protective mode the body forces upon us. It’s an involuntary hibernation to give you the essential restoration your nervous system needs. Chronic stress? Well, that’s what leads you to burnout. Stress acts as a warning signal, and if you're paying attention, it’s your opportunity to implement prevention strategies.

Like me, chronic stress can wreak havoc on the body—raising inflammation, weakening the immune system, disrupting sleep, depleting energy levels, and contributing to issues like headaches, digestive problems, muscle tension, and even a higher risk of heart disease. This physical tax can also lead to a dysregulated nervous system when your body and mind get stuck in a stress response.

The Wake-Up Call: Understanding Your Nervous System

My wake-up call came when my body had given up, my mind was on the fritz, and I was no longer able to work, let alone maintain relationships, wellness, or have any sense of self.

Here are some common signs of dysregulation and burnout to look out for:

• Feeling constantly on edge, anxious, irritable, or emotionally numb.
• Chronic fatigue, muscle tension, headaches, digestive issues, or frequent illness.
• Brain fog, difficulty focusing, forgetfulness, or feeling overwhelmed by small tasks.
• Trouble sleeping, relying on caffeine or sugar for energy, avoiding social interactions, or feeling the need to stay constantly busy.
• Feeling like you have a short fuse, or withdrawing and isolating, or experiencing anxiety or depression, or chronically people-pleasing at the expense of your own needs.

Learning to Listen to My Body

After suppressing the signals my body had been giving me and hustling and grinding far beyond my limits, it was time to start listening to my body—a skill I had to learn. I began by identifying that I had a dysregulated nervous system. That internal sensor of “OK” and “not OK” was out of order, and I needed to learn to regulate my nervous system to repair it. Regulating my nervous system involved a few key steps. Implementing somatic exercises, meditation, setting boundaries, developing self- compassion, and upping my emotional intelligence so that I could identify my needs and get them met.

I started with meditation—guided, evocative, poetic. I found that my feelings resonated with the words of others. This not only helped calm my body, but also my mind. Yoga became a critical part of my treatment. It was a way I could reconnect with my body and rebuild the relationship I had lost. Other somatic exercises like singing and shaking helped with this also.

The Power of Self-Compassion

Self-compassion was a huge part of my internal repair. I identified that my perfectionism and unhealthy relationship with work was fueled by a tough inner critic. Unveiling the inner critic’s presence in my life was a massive hack. After educating myself on self-compassion, I understood that the inner critic wasn’t giving me the motivation for change I thought was necessary. In fact, evidence shows it keeps us stuck. Conversely, self-compassion is the birthplace of change, growth, learning, and healing.

I have a 30-day self-compassion challenge here that you can try if you want to start developing the skill. Here’s a prompt to get you started right now: Do you really think that your friend/child/partner is worthy of compassion and you are not? Why?

Setting Boundaries Changed Everything

Boundary-setting was also key to re-establishing a new relationship with my work. Small, practical boundaries were very helpful. From establishing how many hours in a day I’d work, to having non-negotiable rest scheduled into my day, to putting a 24-hour delay on saying yes or no to a professional/personal request to avoid over-committing. Setting boundaries changed everything. It allowed me to maintain the regulation I achieved through meditation, even in the high-pressure context of work.

Getting to know my needs and figuring out how to get them met was the number one way I achieved emotional regulation. The biggest “aha” moment was when I came to understand I wasn’t the problem; the problem was I had unmet needs. This process involved identifying my maladaptive protective modes and the needs they indicated, then learning how to get those needs met adaptively. This process nixed my anxiety and empowered me to feel confident and comfortable in my own skin. I’ve created a unique Needs Framework to help others do this, too.

Creating Your Burnout Recovery Plan

Interested in creating your own burnout recovery plan—or better yet, prevention plan?

Here are some small steps you could start with:

1. Engage with one physical activity that feels good in your body during AND after. E.g. simple stretching, somatic shaking, butterfly hugs, swimming, and walking in nature.

2. Prioritise a mindfulness window. It doesn’t have to be big, like a 20-minute meditation, how about just removing your shoes in the grass and taking a few deep breaths while you let the dog out for their toilet break?

3. What’s one small INTERNAL boundary you could set to bring more safety to your nervous system? E.g. a day a week where you don’t do any work (including housework), unplugging from a certain time each day, or deciding to only see that friend who tends to drink too much in the AM so your personal boundaries aren’t crossed.

4. Start working with the Needs Framework to better understand yourself by answering this question: How is your identified maladaptive protective mode (e.g. isolation, anxiety, anger, perfectionism, procrastination) trying to help you? This will give you an idea of what one of your needs may actually be. I also offer a free needs assessment to help you get clarity here just book a free 30-minute discovery call with me to get started.

You’ll know you’re making progress when your maladaptive protective modes start diffusing and a great sense of steadiness replaces them. The key components of sustainable recovery are curiosity, compassion, and consistency. If you’re reading this article, you’ve got curiosity in spades - hooray! Compassion is learnable, and consistency simply means showing up for yourself. Trying. And I know you try every day. I know you’re doing your best, and guess what? You’re doing really well.

Professional support can also be essential. In fact, I think it’s always been true that we need others. We are interdependent beings, after all. But maybe we just need to normalise seeking professionals for the support we deserve.

Moving Forward: Life After Burnout

11 years later, post burnout, of course, life ebbs and flows, but for the most part, I feel well, strong, and joyful. I’m steady. No more depression, no more anxiety, and no more chronic pain—my whole life has changed for the better. I can maintain my adaptive protective modes: somatics, meditation, boundaries, and needs management with compassion and ease. These things provide me with my self-care scaffolding. They hold me up and give me the strong foundations I need to step into my life feeling grounded, resilient, powerful, and well.

In addition to being a Guinness World Record holder, Australian Directors Guild award winner, Voice-Over Artist, and Co-Creator of the mental health app Onlyhuman, I am an accredited Meditation Therapist—blending elements of holistic counselling, life coaching, and meditation.

I’m also the creator of the Needs Framework, a simple and effective method of identifying your needs and getting them met to achieve emotional regulation. Using my unique Needs Framework, I’ve worked with thousands of people through workshops, courses, and 1:1 sessions. I’m excited to work with you, too! If you’re keen to try a new approach to your internal repair book in with me today for a free discovery call here. I’m here, I care and I’ve got your back – let’s do this together.